90 For 90s: #70 - #61

Got some heavy hitters lined up for this volume. And for those new to the Rave: 

Intro and B-Side

#90 - 81

#80 - 71

#70. HEY JEALOUSY, Gin Blossoms. There's two types of people in this world: Those who admit they love "Hey Jealousy", and those who lie about it. Though these guys must have watched a lot more "Dukes of Hazzard" than "COPS" if they their idea of fun is being chased around by the fuzz.

#69. UNDONE (THE SWEATER SONG), Weezer. All these years later and I still can't give a straight answer to the simple question: Do you like Weezer? For nostalgic purposes, they're awesome. And I'll put "Blue Album" up there among the best of the 90s. But there's still something about them that rubs me the wrong way and I can't put my finger on it.

#68. WOULD, Alice In Chains. Still can't believe 2 guys from this recording are dead. I like too many dead musicians. Can't help but be reminded of "Singles" when I hear this though - which in my opinion just might be the defining movie of the 90s. Touch Me, I'm Dick.

#67. HYPNOTIZE, The Notorious B.I.G.. I told you. This list is embarrassingly white. But I'm not apologizing, cause I've been smooth since days of underoos.

#66. LIGHTENING CRASHES, Live. If you're old enough to remember, this song became a defacto memorial hymn for the Oklahoma City Bombing back in the Spring of '95. At that point, it was the worst terrorist attack on American Soil. Carried out by angry white veterans who hate that government existed. Today, we call those people the Tea Party, and we let them control our government. Them 1 - Civilized Society 0. Ironically, it did not unleash a wave of anti-white, Christian rural hysteria. Oh, and nobody seemed to mind that the perpetrators were tried, convicted and sentenced (to death) in the US Federal Court System.

#65. SHINE, Collective Soul. Fitting that it slots in here, because I always confuse Collective Soul with Live. That's not a compliment to either.

#64. 3 AM, Matchbox 20. And the unintentional comedy scale explodes as you find out this song was written by Rob Thomas for his mother. Reminds me of an interview for the release of the Matchbox 20 album "Exile on Main Stream" where poor Rob complained about how he was marketed wrong. Riiiiight. Because deep down, you know this pretty boy is the second coming of Jim Morrison.

#63. BLAZE OF GLORY, Jon Bon Jovi.I remember how panicked I got when I saw JBJ was releasing a solo album. Was the Band Done? Thankfully no. They were just understanding of Jon's inexplicable cowboy fetish that they didn't object to his leave of absence to role play as John Wayne in aqua net for a while.

#62. HAND ON THE PUMP, Cypress Hill. Man I thought I was so gangsta when I asked my mommy to put this in my stocking for Christmas 1992. I love the reasoning behind the tune though. You can't understand how easy it is for me to kill someone, so I shall explain it in song.

#62. LOSER, Beck. Ever hear that saying "So underrated it's overrated"? Pretty sure that was invented solely for Beck. But this is an iconic mid-90s track, there's no doubt about it. The premise alone: I'm so f*cking uncool that I'm the coolest bad ass you know.

The King's Speech

Horrible, shocking and disgusting news out of Staten Island: 

NEW YORK - A 13-year-old girl has been arrested on hate crime charges and is accused of helping bully and attack a Muslim girl at their New York City school.

The girl is being charged as a juvenile, along with a 12-year-old boy who was arrested last week. She is charged with third-degree assault as a hate crime and attempted robbery. She is due in Family Court Tuesday.

Authorities say the two bullied and tormented a 13-year-old Muslim girl at the Staten Island school, calling her a "terrorist" and trying to steal from her.

(full story) 

You can call it coincidence if you so chose, but this comes less than a month after NY Congressman Peter King held his McCarthyesque hearings on "Islam and Terrorism" on Capitol Hill. And maybe it is a coincidence. Just like Congresswoman Gabrielle Gifford's attempted assassination was in no way, shape, or form linked to the "Lock 'N Load" language and imagery of the Tea Party.

The Dixie Chicks speak for tens of millions of Americans and say they're embarrassed by George Bush, and what ensues is a big old fashioned German-style CD burning party. Because you know, saying that some bumbling idiot who's broken the world is an "embrassment" is somehow dangerous rhetoric. 

But when the extreme right pops off about Muslims or throws a marksman's target over a Congresswoman's home district on a map, and then violence ensues, we need to watch what we say about where we point our fingers. Don't blame a collective of nutjobs for the action of one lone nutjob. 

I'm not saying speech should be curtailed. I was appalled when that little ass-tick Ari Fleischer said some Americans need to watch what they say during wartime. Free speech knows no few boundaries as far as I'm concerned.

What I am saying though, is educate your friends, relatives and neighbors on who these people are. They ARE hateful. They ARE spiteful. They ARE batshit crazy. They ARE dangerous. Not in speech, but in practice.

Snookered

I rarely use the old "I'm a taxpayer and I'm appalled that you're spending my money on ______" argument. I'm basically resigned to the fact that my money's going to fund bullshit for the most part. Foolish wars, frat boys and other losers molesting Iraqi inmates to get their rocks off, corn subsidies, state dinners for medieval relic European royals - all of it funded by you and me in some way, shape or form.

But sometimes you just have to draw the line, and I'm drawing it right now in my wonderful state of New Jersey, after it's come to light that Rutgers University - THE State University of New Jersey - paid the Jersey Shore's "Snooki" $32,000 to "speak" to "students" recently. 

In the most prosperous of times, there would be no place for this talentless, pathetic devolved fluorescent penguin to be collecting speaking fees from an institution of higher learning. In 2011 when education is under a direct, targeted assault by the governor, every single penny is being squeezed out of the middle class, and it's been harder than ever for them since the end of WWII to send their children to college, the fact that this is how Rutgers University would chose to spend $32,000 falls somewhere between insulting and criminally negligent.

Nobel and Pulitzer Prize Winner Toni Morrison is scheduled to earn $30,000 for her upcoming commencement address. Who's coming up with this scale of compensation? The board at JP Morgan Chase? 

Higher Education in New Jersey has been taking a beating from Trenton for two decades now. A global recession just makes it easier for the Republicans to sell the cuts. But this is the world we live in, where teachers and firefighters caused a worldwide financial meltdown and the Wall Street execs are partying so hard Gordon Gecko's blushing. To paraphrase Don Rumsfeld - You get the budget you have, not the budget you want. Fact of the matter is, Rutger's state aid was slashed roughly 15% for fiscal year 2010-11 and it's proposed to remain at that level this year. Tuition up 5%. Housing more than that. Meal plans more than that.

Within these fiscal confines, there is absolutely no possible justification for that trampy Oompa-Loompa to be commanding that much money from a State University. The actual money itself came from some "event fund" that draws some loot off of every tuition bill paid by every student. Discretionary or not, it's still a check being signed by the State University of New Jersey.

The school fought back against the criticism by saying something to the effect of "It's who the students want to see". Well frankly, that's the students' problem and it's your job as a university to possibly enlighten them to aspects of culture beyond such filth.

I'm sure a similar plurality of students "want to see" nickel beer night at the cafeteria and maybe a medical marijuana dispensary at the infirmary. And frankly, a night of both would easily cost less than $32,000.

The 2nd and 3rd highest paid adjunct professors at RU combined don't make $32,000 per year. If say, an adjunct professor is teaching 2 classes per semester, and there's 2 semesters in a year, that's 8 college courses that could have been taught instead of paying Snooki to teach students that "When you're tan, you feel better about yourself".

On a larger scale, sure, we're all to blame here for making celebrities out of these douchebags, dingleberries and dickheads. I get that. I take no responsibility for myself but do for my state. It's eerily reminiscent when I traveled abroad in 2003 and felt compelled to apologize for George Bush, even though I never once entertained the idea of voting for him, nor did I support any of his endeavors beyond the "No Call List". So yeah, by extension, it's got to be pretty hard for a lot of people to tune in every Whateverday Night to MTV and watch the trainwreck, then get upset that young people want to see society's afterbirth speak live at their school. 

But that doesn't make it right or acceptable. Even if I'd love to hear her insight on what it means to leave Rutgers Cum Laude.