Friday, February 12, 2010

Five For Friday 2/12/10

And the Wheel of Topics stops on………..Politics. Happy Valentine’s Day



FIVE PEOPLE I’M GLAD WE DON’T HAVE TO HEAR FROM ANYMORE
5. Tony Snow. It’s a shame when someone doesn’t see their 60th birthday and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. But when you spent what turned out to be your last decade on earth as a Fox News host AND White House Press Secretary for the Bush Administration, consider it Karmic Justice.
4. Strom Thurmond. Segregationist. With illegitimate black children. Yet consistently sent back to the Senate for half a decade. We totally mismanaged Reconstruction.
3. Jerry Falwell. Evangelical that blamed 9/11 on gays. And people continued to send him money. And people still pay to send their children his Madrasah known as “Liberty University”. Baffling.
2. Timothy McVeigh. Follow this train of thought: Tea Baggers think the President’s soft on terrorism. Timmy McV was the original Tea Bagger. I wonder if this dichotomy was discussed at the $500 per ticket convention for average folks.
1. Ronald Reagan. Every major problem of 2010: Terrorism emanating from Afghanistan, the lack of workers’ protections, the greatest disparity of wealth in history, and the lack of financial safeguards and regulations can be traced back to this shitbag. Yet anti-gay conservatives are so unbelievably gay for him. His chickens all came home to roost over the last 10 years and lucky for us, we get to see Reaganism in all it’s glory manifested in this shitstorm we call Life On Earth 2010.

FOUR PEOPLE WE UNFORTUNATELY DO HEAR FROM
4. Sean Hannity. I don’t care about demagogues like Glen Beck and Rush Limbaugh. They only reach a small, bitter, aging, angry, lilywhite portion of the population. What’s dangerous about Hannity is that people think he’s a middle of the road analyst who tells it like it is, when the reality is he’s squarely in the Beck/Limbaugh/Savage/Goebbels camp.
3. Sarah Palin. I have a love/hate relationship with Misses Reproduce Like Rabbits and Pass That Core Family Value On To My Daughter. On one hand, I despise every sentence uttered from that vast open space between her ears. On the other, despite the fact that Bushie got “elected” twice, I can’t possibly see America voting for someone that fucking dumb so having her in a prominent position within the GOP is probably good for America.
2. Tim Tebow. I’m pretty much convinced he’s a Jihadist. I think Homeland Security needs to be on alert the first time he travels to play in San Francisco, New York or Seattle this upcoming season.
1. Joe Lieberman. Self-serving prick. Nothing left to say.


THREE SIMPLE QUESTIONS I’VE ASKED MANY TIMES THAT STILL HAVE NOT BEEN ANSWERED INTELLIGENTLY
3. How Does Same-Sex Marriage Threaten The Institution of Marriage Itself? Seriously? Is everyone going to divorce their spouse and go marry someone of the same gender? Honestly, can somebody PLEASE answer this w/o referring to God or Scripture?
2. What “Freedoms” Do “They” Hate Us For? Dubya uttered this bullshit about 4 hours after the attacks and people just took him at his word (No need to examine the track record of “His Word” is there?). But nobody’s quite translated this into something that people who can read at the 4th Grade Level or better can understand. Do they not like that we can choose between Coke and Pepsi? Does our freedom to petition our government in a chain-link-fenced in “Free Speech Zone” piss them off so much that they had to commit an act of war?
1. How, Over The Span of One Lifetime, Do You Go From Nazi Labor Camp Guard To Pope? From guardian of the Third Reich to Successor of Saint Peter. Amazing. What’s more amazing is how many people just shrug it off, especially considering that he signed up long after it was compulsory. Next time you hear a rags-to-riches story and some hillbilly inevitably says “Only in America”, you say “Nah-ah. Did you know that in the Vatican you can go from decorated Nazi to Jesus’ earthly representative?”


TWO TRAITS I’VE NOTICED IN GOVERNOR CHRIS CHRISTIE THAT SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME:


2. He Was Once A US Attorney
1. He Has A Slight Lisp
How long until we find out that he once married his cousin and likes to dress in drag? The minute he tells you to “Walk North” you should run for the hills instead.

ONE PERSON WHO I’LL DEFEND EVEN IF I’M THE LAST ONE TO DO SO
1. Nancy Pelosi. Forget about the criticisms from the far right, as noted they’re old and decaying and for the most part, will be dead soon. But the Left is (understandably) mad as hell about the inaction in DC. I am too. However, like 5% of the nation, I know how government works. I know the difference between a Speaker of the House and Senate Majority Leader (Cough: And President). Anything the Prez asked for from the House, Speaker Pelosi’s delivered: Stimulus, Jobs, Cap’n Trade, and of course, Health Care. Despite being demonized and caricaturized, she keeps fuckin’ that chicken and providing results.


The problem lies in the Senate where Harry Reid can’t get 2 Democrats to order a seltzer with lime without them both asking “What’s in it for me?” Likewise, the White House has done a miserable job in strong-arming said senate democrats. But leave the Speaker out of this. She’s passed everything that we elected a majority to pass, and as an added bonus, those bigots and misogynists known as Tea Baggers have to not only deal with a black president, but a female Speaker of the House. From San Francisco!

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Top Twenty Tuesday

Now that arguably the most beleaguered franchise in sports has won the Super Bowl, it's time to run down the next 20 most potentially heartwarming, touching, feelgoody, Oprahish, hallmark championships possible in professional North American Sports:

20. Pittsburgh Penguins - Remember the days of Jagr and Lemieux? Longer ago than I'd like to admit. The NHL's better of when Pittsburgh is relevant.
19. Jacksonville Jaguars - Because deep down inside, you're dying to see a Super Bowl Parade with 50 people in attendance.
18. Chicago Bears - Jay Cutler doing the inevitable Super Bowl Shuffle reprise would break the Unintentional Comedy Scale.
17. Cleveland Cavaliers -  Probably the only acceptable parting gift as the LeBron Era comes to a close.
16. Minnesota Twins - Joe Mauer is so wholesome and such a proud Minnesota native that he's likely going to take a lesser salary, something like $200 million over 10 years, to stay in Minneapolis. If that doesn't pull at your heartstrings, you're not human.
15. New York Giants - Second fiddle in the family no more. For younger brothers everywhere.
14. San Diego Chargers -  Complete the Class of 04 Trifecta and give LaDainian Tomlinson the Tiki Barber treatment.
13. Milwaukee Brewers - For beer lovers everywhere.
12. Philadelphia 76ers - I'd honestly like to be able to know who their coach is without having to wiki it every time it comes up in conversation.
11. Chicago Blackhawks - Wow, Michael Jordan really saved the Windy City from being a more populated version of Cleveland, didn't he?
10. Cleveland Indians - Speaking of which.
9. Buffalo Bills - The time has come for a Canadian Super Bowl winner. Since they can't win Stanley Cups anymore.
8. Pittsburgh Pirates- Imagine the storylines. A team that pays their players $5.50 an hour competing against the big bad teams from bigger markets. Ever notice how everyone, when talking about baseball payrolls, always rushes to defend "Poor Pittsburgh?" The Marlins winning 2 World Series didn't shut them up, but maybe the Pirates can.
6/7 (tie) New York Knicks/New York Rangers. As Madison Square Garden goes, so goes the NBA/NHL. Personally, I hate the Knicks. But if you were to chart the popularity of both leagues over the last 20 years, you'd see a major spike in 1994.
5. Cleveland Browns - The city has Drew Carry and it's losing LeBron James. They saw the Ravens win a Super Bowl 4 years after bolting. They can't even keep the Rock'n Roll Hall of Fame Concert in Cleveland.
4. Toronto Maple Leafs - For all of us who can't live without spell-check.
3. Chicago Cubs - Simply because I'm so sick of the "cursed loveable loser" tag. Let them lose their identity the way the Red Sox did.
2. Detroit Lions - We all know what Bush did to New Orleans, but the denigration of Detroit has been a bi-partisan, multi-lateral, , multi-generational effort.
1. New York Yankees - Hey, Curtis Granderson needs a ring too you know?

Friday, February 5, 2010

Five For Friday 2/5/10

Take it all with a grain of salt, because I obviously don't know anything about music considering Taylor Swift apparently cut the greatest album in the history of ears, and here I am thinking she's a poor man's Debbie Gibson.

FIVE COVERS THAT ARE BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL:

5. Boys of Summer, The Ataris (original artist: Don Henley). Loses some points for replacing “Dead-Head” with “Black Flag”.

4. Superstar, Sonic Youth (The Carpenters). Face it: There ain’t anything cool about the Carpenters, save for some outdated jokes about eating disorders. Sonic Youth erases the stigma of listening to the Carpenters. Victory.

3. The Star Spangled Banner, Jimi Hendrix (Everyone under the sun). Nothing’s more American than the national anthem and Hendrix was a unique American genius. Perfect match. Performed at Woodstock in front of many people who would eventually refuse to fight for LBJ. American heroes. (I’m a bi-partisan asshole. Stupid presidents and stupid wars are stupid regardless of party). Oh, and for what it’s worth, I’m in that .00003% of people who prefer Dylan’s “Watchtower” to Jimi’s. So no, I’m not missing the obvious here.

2. Scarlet Begonias, Sublime (Grateful Dead). A great GD song. A legendary Sublime tune. Added a verse about selling drugs. Awesome.

1.Hurt, Johnny Cash (Nine Inch Nails). Award for strangest cover also. A legend prepares to die. I eat that shit up.





FOUR COVERS CONSIDERED MUSICAL TREASON:
4. Can’t Help Falling in Love, UB40 (Elvis Presley). Had to flip a coin between this abomination and the audio diarrhea that was their cover of Neil Diamond’s “Red, Red Wine”. Heads it it.


3. No Woman, No Cry (The Fugees). Terrible. Insulting. Disgraceful.


2. American Pie, Madonna (Don McLean). Would it be too easy to refer to her recording of this iconic hit as “The Day The Music Died?”


1. Sweet Child O’Mine, Sheryl Crow (Guns N Roses). Having Sheryl Crow sing this GNR classic is basically the equivalent of having Bill Cosby draw over the Mona Lisa on Picture Pages.


THREE ALBUMS TO GET YOU THROUGH ST. PATRICK’S DAY SEASON:


3. This Light, Emish. Orange County, New York can produce more than motorcycles and oranges as Emish attests. And This Light has the requisite “Fields of Athenry” to make your Paddy’s season a success.

2. Drunken Lullabies, Flogging Molly. Buy it. You’ll thank me.


1. 25th Anniversary, The Wolfe Tones. Don’t know why I said three when this is really all you need. There’s some classics missing from the collection (Most notably “Streets of New York” and “Some Say the Divil is Dead”) but tis a great album to blast loud enough so the British can hear you.


TWO POPULAR CDS FROM THE 1990s I ENJOY MORE NOW THAN I DID THEN:


2. Californication, Red Hot Chili Peppers. Must not have been in the right headspace at the time, I thought this album was junk. Alas, like my original opinion on the necessity of an iPod (and John Edwards’ character), I was dead wrong.

1.Vitalogy, Pearl Jam. Thought this disc was a major downer upon it’s 1994 release. In all fairness, expectations were through the roof after Ten and Vs. Looking back, it features one of the band’s 5 best songs ("Corduroy") and 2 others I’d put in the top 15 in "Better Man" and "Nothingman". Wish I could say this was the only thing I was wrong about at 17, but I’m sure there’s some documentation out there linking my beliefs at the time to those of Pat Buchanan.


ONE RECENTLY DOWNLOADED (BAD) SONG FOR NOSTALGIC PURPOSES
1. Knockin’ Boots, Candyman. Good lord I forgot how bad (yet extremely enjoyable) this song was. Cheesy Bubble-gum rock gets plenty of play but where’s the love for rap’s equivalent? Would a rap single today even use the word “breasts” – or would it simply be “tits” with a half-assed bleep out on the radio?

I enjoy the degeneration of our societal standards as much as the next guy and look forward to a day with no FCC and no Faux-Outrage over Super Bowl Boobs and the like, but that doesn’t mean I can’t respect a song about sloppy post-show sex that does it’s damndest to keep it PG. If you’re between the ages of 27 and 35, I highly recommend you spend the 99 cents and enjoy. Or, you know, illegally download it but the Recording Industry of America asks that we don’t do that, and they’ve always had our best interests in mind, right?





















Tuesday, February 2, 2010

A (Half) Day In The Life of an iPod

An ideal Day in the office is one of those days where I can throw the earbuds in, hit play on the iPod's shuffle, lock the device and get to work. People tend to ask less questions you're listening to the iPod, which is another unexpected gift. Today's been one of those days, save for a few required interactions. How has the machine treated me so far? You can be the judge:

1. Say Please - Monsters of Folk. A treat to start it off. Technically the shuffle starts with "Take on Me" by A-ha as it's sorted alphabetically by artist. That song never gets heard.
2. Wild Honey Pie - The Beatles. 50 Seconds that made me contemplate listening to the entire White Album. But there's more shuffling in store.
3. Sweet Music Man - Kenny Rogers. When you think it's it's a great idea to upload your father's entire CD collection, think again. Unlock -> Skip
4. Forever Young (Live at Budokan) - Bob Dylan. Try as hard as you want Pepsi, you can't ruin this gem.
5. Just Friends - Amy Winehouse. Ehhhhhh
6. My Sweet One - Phish. 10:45 this morning and still stuck in my head.
7. Youth Gone Wild - Skid Row. Now we're talkin'. Sebastian Bach - Most Underrated Canadian.
8. That Old Thing - Bela Fleck and the Flecktones. Not the best follow up to the Skids.
9. Break On Through - The Doors. Most recent remaster version, has a random Jim scream in the chorus. Don't like it.
10. Kryptonite - 3 Doors Down. Ashamed to enjoy this song as much as I do.
11. Martyr - Rusted Root. Not Ecstasy. Not Send Me on My Way. One of the others.
12. Pullin Me In - Wyclef Jean. Did you know he's from Haiti?
13. One Week - Barenaked Ladies. Even when I'm not putting this on a playlist, it's showing up in a playlist. Saw them in concert once. There's a moral to that story I should tell you about some time.
14. I Shall Be Released (Biograph) - Bob Dylan. Doesn't get much better than this.
15. The Price You Pay - Bruce Springsteen. How come The River isn't considered one of his staple albums?
16. Dive In - Dave Matthews Band. It seems they're no Taylor Swift per the experts.
17. My Little Demon - Fleetwood Mac. Don't mean to burst bubbles, but they're not that good of a band. At all.
18. Wrecking Ball - Bruce Springsteen. Pour Some Out for Giants Stadium.
19. Cool Dry Place - Traveling Wilburys. One of these days I won't need to wiki the lineup.
20. This Protector - White Stripes. Getting into a groove now, iPod's being generous.
21. Jesus Walks - Kanye West. Groove. Ended.
22. Back in the USSR - The Beatles. Reggie (this iPod's name) diggin the White Album.
23. Voodoo Lady - Ween. Making me wanna root for the Saints.
24. Let It Rock - Bon Jovi.  Classic album opener.
25. I'll Sleep When I'm Dead - Bon Jovi. Uh-oh. Back to back. I smell a run.
26. Piece of My Heart - Janis Joplin. Yeah, I just wanna be in Pine Hall right now.
27. Mystery Train - The Doors (Live in Boston) - Can only imagine what was being passed around the Boston Garden this night.
28. Home Sweet Home - Motley Crue. Did you know Vince Neal is a dreamer, but his heart's of gold?
29. Put Another Nickel In - Teresa Brewer. See Rogers, Kenny
30. Flourescent Adolescent - Arctic Monkeys. Love this song. Think it's about sex. I ain't as hip as I used to be.
31. To All The Girls I've Loved Before - Willie Nelson and Julio Iglesias. Musical, as well as Unintentional Comedy GOLD. A classic. Pretty sure I dedicated something "To all the girls I loved before" in my HS yearbook. God I was a prick.
32. It's All Understood - Jack Johnson. Not exactly the most motivating tune.
33. Separate Ways - Journey. I should just cut out of here and go hit up a dive-bar and drink bud bottles.
34. Little Deuce Coupe - The Beach Boys. And they were friends with Charlie Manson?
35. Cumblerland Blues - The Grateful Dead. Hells yeaaaaaaaaaaahhhh
36. Just Breathe - Pearl Jam. Slowly starting to think "Backspacer" is fucking awesome, though I always confuse this tune for Eddie Vedder's "Into the Wild" solo work.
37. She Said She Said - The Beatles. In the midst of a potential run of high quality tunage.
38. When Jesus Left Birmingham - John Mellencamp. And the run continues. I ain't ashamed to admit it, I did the Cougar.
39. Till We Aint Strangers Anymore - Bon Jovi. Save for 4 or 5 songs, I'm not interested in anything the boys wrote after 1993. This ain't one of those 5.
40. Mike's Song - Phish. It's a live version, so that means it's great for the first 3 minutes and completely skippable thereafter.
41. Captain Crash and the Beauty Queen - Bon Jovi. Who do I gotta blow to get some Living In Sin action?
42. Up on Cripple Creek - The Band. A top 20 of all time tune.
43. She's So High - Tal Bachman. A top 20 Million of all time tune.
44. Proud Mary - CCR. I'm due for another Creedence Kick in 3 more years.
45. I'm So Afraid - Fleetwood Mac. 6500 songs. 10 of which are Fleetwood Mac. I should get 1 every 650, not 1 every 22.5
46. Walk Believer Walk - Black Crowes. I'm sorry, I put "Warpaint" up there with their best albums. Both of the other two.
47. Rock and Roll Hoochie Koo - Rick Derringer. Factoid: Derrringer also sang Hulk Hogan's "Real American".
48. Be Mine - David Gray. He blows.
49. Dig - Incubus. A welcome change of pace.
50. Down By The River - Neil Young. Might be my favorite Neil Young song ever.
51. You Are The Sunshine - Stevie Wonder. Not his best work, plus forever tainted by MinuteMaid commercials of the late 1980s.
52. Happy Jack - The Who. One day it will be the theme song to CSI: Dumont.

And Sugar Magnolia  from the Cow Palace 1976 just made a most-welcome appearance. Good shit. Back to work.




Tuesday, January 26, 2010

The Book of Rock, Chapter 1

Some couples enjoy walks on the beach. Some enjoy an evening of fine dining and dancing (at least that’s what the movies say, I've never been out at a restaurant where people got up to dance to Tony Bennett). Some are into gardening.


My wife and I? We love nothing more than spending a Saturday morning with two pots of coffee and debating controversial issues of the day. Save for a few mornings where I'm nursing an unexpected hangover (I always think I'm gonna party on Fridays but usually pass out 20 minutes into "Numbers" after a beer and a half), our "Saturday Morning chats" have slowly become a ritual over the last 8 years.

Heck, I even have a custom playlist for it, which is the final step in my canonization of a tradition.


At the end of each match, er, morning, the cornucopia of topics is usually boiled down to one premise: my personal inability to grasp why 85% of this planet is so hell-bent on "Faith". So as not to offend, I generally stick to complaints about Christianity, since that's the culture I was raised in and I've noticed in this PC world, you're allowed to go off the handle, use offensive terminology and make broad, blanketing statements - as long as it's your own culture/heritage you're demeaning.


Occasionally, as I'm doing a little "Bible Bashing" my wife will point out that when you take away the bullshit that's used to polarize and politicize in our modern times, the Bible can offer some important life lessons. To me, the only lesson that sticks out is: Unless you've hired a miracle worker, make sure you have enough booze at a wedding.

Moving beyond  burning bulls to atone for homosexual acts, I'll take her word that indeed, there are valuable lessons to be learned. I will counter, however, that the same can be said for Rock'N Roll, and rock is eminently more enjoyable than reading a 2,000 year old book that's been translated over and over again.

Looking exclusively at "Classic Rock", I ask that you consider...

"You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you might find, you get what you need" - The Rolling Stones. As one who's currently trying to lose some baby-fat, I would point out how this is insanely good dieting advice. I want a Double Bacon Angry Whopper with extra pepper jack sauce. I need a granola bar. Problem solved.

"You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows" - Bob Dylan. Don't let someone piss on your face and tell you it's raining. Just because they call it a "Clear Skies Initiative" doesn't mean it's good for their environment, and here's another hint: Nobody hates you for your freedoms.

"The sun will shine on my backdoor someday" - The Grateful Dead. Life ain't always gonna suck, get over it. I mean, there's another way to interpret this too I guess, but I'll leave that up to you.

"In Birmingham they love the Governor, Now we all did what we can do" - Lynyrd Skynyrd. Um, white guys from Alabama are generally racist.

"You say you got a real solution, well you know, we'd all love to see the plans" - The Beatles. Lead, Follow, or Shut the Fuck Up.

"Into this house we're born. Into this world we're thrown" - The Doors. Life ain't always fair, you got to play the hand you're dealt. The sooner you realize this and adjust your expectations, the easier it all becomes.

"Freedom's just another word for nothing left to loose" - Janis Joplin. The more you own, the less you have.

Call me irreverent, call me ornery and close-minded, call me crazy. But I ask, is this any crazier than relying on a manuscript penned 2600 years ago that declares how long, and under what circumstances, a woman shall remain "unclean" after child birth?

Keep on Truckin'

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Pussies "R" Us

Surprised that a Republican nude model won Teddy Kennedy’s seat? A seat that hasn’t been held by a Republican since Henry Cabot Lodge? Don’t be. Nobody’s better at snatching defeat from the jaws of victory better than the Democrats, and a simple look at the scorecard just verifies it:


US v. THEM
THEM: They impeached a sitting President over a fucking blowjob. The most basic of simple human pleasures.
US: We won’t even investigate a former Vice President’s confirmed role in torture, a role that he’s pretty much broadcast over every major media outlet.


THEM: They were sitting in office for the worst terrorist attack on American soil in history and act like they’re the only ones capable of defending the country, even though they stalled the formation of a Homeland Security Department 5 years prior to 9/11.
US: One crazy radical with bombs in his underwear gets disarmed in flight and we allow ourselves to be portrayed as incapable and defenseless, by no less of a fraudulent expert than Rudy “The Crossdresser” Giuliani, he who decided an Emergency Response Center should be stationed in the WTC.


US: We have Dick Durban tearfully apologizing for comparing Guantanamo Bay and Abu Graihb to “Gulags”
THEM: They attend raucous rallies where claims are made that the Commander In Chief of the Armed Forces is a “Foreign Born Muslim Operative”.


THEM: Won’t think twice about launching a war, clearly without any absence of fact, logic or preparation.
US: Will pout as we both vote to authorize it, and worse, continue to execute it while we have the authority to end it.


THEM: They literally hold hands with the Saudi Royal Family and allow the bin Laden family to fly around the country while all flights are grounded on 9/11. Despite allegedly knowing that 16 of the 19 hijackers were Saudi nationals.
US: We take it on the chin while they accuse us of attending to Haiti’s needs in time of crisis because “Haitians are brown”.


I can go on and on but what’s the point. Until Democrats stand up for core Democratic values like equal treatment for all, a fair playing ground, consumer protection, reasonable and rational defense and foreign policy and basic worker protections, they’re going to continue to lose elections.


They can’t frame an argument to save their lives and they have no friggin backbone. Health care’s a perfect example. Who gives a flying you-know-what what the insurance industry wants? Come up with your plan and muscle it through, use reconciliation if you must. But instead, they decided to give everyone a tug-job to the point where nobody: left, right or center wants this plan.


Is there hope that the tide will turn? I guess there always is. Look no further than the economic and poll numbers of both Ronald Reagan and Bill Clinton after one year in office. Reagan, as despicable as it was, still managed to push his agenda through with little resistance from the opposition that happened to control both chambers of congress. For some reason he was a renowned speaker and his team used this to forge a mandate.


Clinton, after taking hard midterm losses, became decidedly more centrist, practiced triangulation on everything down to what type of coffee would be served at congressional leadership meetings, and while many results were positive, he still ended up in front of a camcorder during a deposition.


Did record numbers of voters go to the polls last November to elect a boring, middle of the road triangulator like Bill Clinton? Hell no. We had that choice in the primary and we kicked her to the curb. You were elected to be transformative Mr. President, and somehow you let the Republicans (who broke this fucking world) relate more to the middle class than your own party. It's time to take a page from their playbook and raise hell, fuck the facts and get shit done.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Hit The Road Harry

All the way back in 2002, before YouTube and iPhones, before Change became a proper noun, then-Senate Majority Leader (or, soon to be) Trent Lott declared that America would be a better place if Segregationist Strom (Is it hot enough for you yet?) Thurmond was elected President in 1948. From my soap-box placed in the middle of my one bedroom apartment at the time, I demanded Lott be replaced. Not long after that, he did in fact step down, though I'm not quite sure if it was in response to me, or the rest of the thinking public which included (the first and last time he'll be included in the group "thinking public") President Bush.


Here we are in 2010 and another Senate Majority Leader has, like too many people before him, put himself in the crosshairs of the perpetual debate over racial and ethnic sensitivity. In a "deep background" interview with authors of the 2008 election recap Game Change, Harry Reid referred to President Barack Obama as 'light-skinned' and as having 'no Negro dialect'.


Naturally, the Republicans are calling this a double standard and demanding that Reid resign, citing that (ever so vaguely) 7 years ago, their Senate Leader goofed in the racial minefield so what's fair is fair and now the Democrats' Senate Leader should do the same.


Let's be clear right off the bat: To say this is apples and oranges would be an insult to fruit. This is more like apples and motor oil.


For starters, Lott was from Mississippi. Yes, call me crazy, judgmental or insensitive, I don't care. That matters. Mississippi's history with race relations makes South Africa cringe. Furthermore, Lott had a spotty, if not shameful, record in the Civil Rights arena. He voted against a MLK Holiday, many affirmative action measures, and if given the chance, likely would have voted against ending slavery.

Harry Reid on the other hand has a nearly impeccable record regarding Civil Rights on the surface (The problem arises with Reid when you dig deeper into reproductive rights). In this same book in question, we learn that Reid was working behind the scenes to not only get Obama into the race, but to help him win it, though that led to the unfortunate remark. I honestly don't look at Reid and think, you know, that dude's a bigot.


Discussions over race is a combat zone, there's no disputing that. I'm one of the handful of people who consider themselves left of center that thought Don Imus deserved to keep his job after his snafu. I just didn't think his intent was as ugly as his choice of words. Often times, and excuse the horrible pun, we see things in terms of black and white while the reality is, it's one big industrial sized barrel of gray. We can only attempt to judge intent. Sometimes (John Rocker) it's pretty easy. Other times (Jimmy the Greek), not so much. More often than not, it's an excuse for everybody to advance their agenda, regardless of the facts - I don't care if it's Al Sharpton or Glenn Beck.


It's not the PC thing to say, but you can't expect a 75 year old to be as tolerant as a 25 year old. It's just not a fair expectation in the slightest. I'm not accusing all senior citizens of being bigoted, not at all. But while we love to look back and revise history, you can't ignore the fact that our environment shapes us, no matter how stupefying that environment may now seem.


All of that being said, it's time for Harry Reid to resign. Forget about the political reality (that he's likely going to lose in November anyway) or the logistical necessities (his deep involvement in health care reform), or even the fact that, by all accounts, the President has accepted his apology and moved on (thankfully no beer summit needed).


I want Reid to step down for a reason much more simple than political sausage-making: I'm a registered Democrat and I don't feel comfortable with the fact that my party's Senate leader is that out of touch with the realities of life in 2010 America. I'm sure Harry is a great guy, probably a wonderful husband, father, grandpa, etc. But his choice of words speaks volumes to not only his worldview, but his perception (or lack thereof) of reality.

I'm as disappointed as anyone at the lack of "real change" one year into the Administration, though I definitely concede the challenges were more enormous than anticipated. That doesn't change the fact that an overwhelming majority of Americans last November went to the polls to cast a vote for moving forward, for forging that More Perfect Union that the founders laid out, and for moving away from the Us v. Them mentality that nearly brought our laws, our defense and our nation to her knees.


You want to use the term "Negro Dialect" in 2010, that's you're right, but you'd be better of using it at one of those Klan Rallies disguised as a "Tea Party" then in your Senate Majority Leader office. Especially when you consider who the millions of people are that made you the Majority - people who find such a thought process to be antiquated at best and abusive at worst.

I wish Senator Reid the best of luck, and would sincerely hope that his career isn't defined by this low point. I just don't think naturally using those words can be reconciled with the agenda of so many millions of people who put him in such a position of leadership.